We’re week three into our reno, and I’m proud to say that Dave and I have not broken up yet. To say he’s been the toughest client to date is the understatement of the year. Love the guy, but mother of sweet Jesus, he’s impossible to please! In our now 10 years together (whew!) we’ve only had one blowout and we rarely ever fight in any real way, but let me tell you, this renovation has made this a feisty relationship!
That said we’ve worked through the struggles and we’ve come out on the other side, so far anyway.
Real talk time, as I do. The thing that has been hard with this reno is that I feel an insane amount of pressure on the final outcome. Pressure I’ve put on myself of course. Like, somehow our home is the one and only time or place where I can completely showcase my true aesthetic and point of view. My true self. I won’t lie, I wish I could do that, if I was flying solo and designing this house alone, it would look different. But the truth is, I’m not alone, I’m sharing my life with my partner in crime who has been there and continues to be there for me in hard times, through a career change all while being my biggest supporter (even if his push-back and opinions on our reno make me question that from time to time!). There’s two of us here, turns out he has strong opinions (and yes, to those who know him, it’s as confusing to me as it likely is to you that he even cares), and like I do for my client’s it’s important that our home reflects who we are, not just who I am. I now realize that our new home will represent my aesthetic, but an aesthetic that also considers the ideas and preferences of the person who matters most to me in my life, because I’m not designing my home, I’m designing our home.
I also put pressure on myself when friends and followers on social media comment and say things like “I can’t wait to see the end result, i’s going to be so amazing.” Insert terrified face here. My brain can’t help but feel like it’s going to disappoint or not live up to what people expect. Remember when I said “real talk time”? I wasn’t lying. I’m insanely hard on myself, admittedly in a very unhealthy way. I have been working on this unhealthy mindset, and I’m happy to say I’ve gotten much closer to figuring out some of the reasons my brain works this way. While I work my way through that, I will continue trying to let go of the pressure I put on myself and just do the best I can with a partner who has too many opinions and a budget that will only go so far.
The good news is that while I am very hard on myself, I’m also really good at finding the positive in things. I’m using this experience to gain a sense of empathy for my clients. How’s that? Well…
1) I get it, partner is a pain in the ass too, so when you are arguing with your husband (or vice versa) about the right ceiling detail for your dining room, I can offer some insights on how to navigate your way through that (hint: the first step is letting him have all the audio equipment he wants, it’ll soften his heart)
2) I too have lived in complete disarray (aka our basement), and it really sucks. Empathy is a gift which allows me to feel and understand what you’re going through while I’m transforming your home, and again, offer some tips to getting through that time.
As I said we’re three weeks in, and Rose Gold Homes + Design, is thinking it’ll be a 9 to 10 week renovation. It’s happening pretty fast (but then again, isn’t life moving way faster than any of us can handle?!). I’ve been so happy with Michael (owner of Rose Gold) and his team for their work and professionalism so far.
Here is a sneak peel of the scheme for our bathroom, and guys, Dave didn’t poo-poo the wallpaper. I’m getting through to him 😉 You can visit our Instagram to see a whack of videos of the progress or follow along using this hashtag #mbdprojectmakemyhomeamazing